Enjoying everyday as they happen, bad or good.

Hello everyone! I hope you are all having a good day.

I honestly am at a loss of what to type. I know that I should type what/how I feel like but it is just my day always seems the same at the moment and when I do feel like typing something that is worth writing about, I am too busy to bring out my laptop or phone. I honestly think that I need to just keep a notebook on me and write down what I want to write and wait until I have time to type everything out. I am just truly lucky that I do have a job where I am able to sit down and take some time to type out my thoughts and posts. Also with job 1 I am able to enjoy my bible study with Helen Elizabeth, to catch up on my readings, and to just be able to relax a bit before I go into job 2.

But this is isn’t the whole point of this posting. haha Thanks to God, myself, and the experiences (bad and good) I have had over the past 8 almost 9 years have really taught me to slow down and enjoy everyday as it happens and be okay with how my day goes.

I was talking to my Auntie O last night on the phone and just telling her how my life as been going and catching her up on my life (she lives in a different area of California), I was just going on and letting her know how everything in my life was going and how much stuff was happening in it. I mentioned to her that none of the other ladies my age at job 2 had the same things to do in their lives. I always wondered that because me the dorky person I am always thought that people in the same age group were similar and apparently that is not how it always is. My auntie told me because I have greater responsibilities than them and that I am responsible for a lot more than the average 26 year old. In my head though, I feel like that isn’t it and I feel like I do take everyday as it comes and I feel like I do relax but apparently to everyone else, I am “too busy”.

Right now I bet you are wondering what this has to do with me enjoying everyday? Well… don’t worry I am in the same mindset as you. haha So let me get back to why I wanted to post this post.

I live each day enjoying it as much as possible because I know how it feels to really live the saying “Live as it is your last day”. From the age of 18 to now, I have lost between 15-20 family members, family friends, and friends in my life. No one should lose so many people in such a short time and some were unexpected and some were expected but it all still hurts the same. Losing so many people in a short time really changes how a person thinks, feels, and how they ultimately act in life.

I know most days of my life are good and I have no complaints because I have the mindset to make them that way, I take the time to pray to God (which some people don’t do because they don’t believe in God and that is 100% okay), and I try to make certain choices to be okay during the day. Don’t get me wrong I do have bad days! Where I do question God, I question why certain things throughout the day are happening the way they are happening, and I question why I am not at a certain place in my life. I am just so lucky to have been able to train my brain and my life to be an okay place for myself. It didn’t just happen over night, it did take me years and years of growing and making mistakes to finally get to a place that I need to be at to be happy and content in my life.

I just honestly during my days where I am having a good day or even a bad day I reflect on what I have in life and what I am thankful for having. That is how I honestly try to find the good in each day and I try to enjoy the day also.

I would love to hear well read what or how you guys helped yourself grow into the person you are today!

I hope you all have a ____ day!!

♡ Jes.

Changed who I am.

Hello everyone! Sorry, I haven’t really been keeping up with the schedule of posting, I am going to start now at being better about it! This post I am going to post about is very important to me and how I became who I am today and the challenges I go through to stay the way I am today.

I haven’t always been this… I honestly don’t know how to describe myself.. so I will give it a try. Anywho I haven’t always been the girl who has been finding her way to get in touch with God, trying to eat/live/be healthy and green, and trying to be a positive energy living human being. I have been sometimes the bitchy, moody, irritable, and annoyed girl who didn’t care about most things except her family and staying safe away from people.

Now that I think about it, I feel like I was that way is because of my depression and how I didn’t know honestly what a friend was. Yeah, friends are supposed to be there for you, support you, not judge you for things you do, and be ok with how you act in life but did I have that in high school or my life until now? No, I did not! So, I have cut out those people from my life and decided to change how my life is and how I am in life.

My life now is so different from life back then. I used to pretend back then to be ok no matter what, I would fight my mind and not be so opened to myself or other people in my life. I now don’t do that anymore, I have now opened up my life to my family and here on social media. Yes, I still keep things somewhat private and hidden (ex: my nephews’ names & faces) but it is usually for the protection of others. Overall I have tried since the beginning of 2019 to live my life the same in all aspects of life. I dress how you would all think I’d probably dress, I act the way you may think I act because of the way I write, and I am way more friendly then I used to be.

I just wish that certain people that I know and who know me (as the old me) really got to see how I am now. They have this misconception of me because of who I was in the past and keep bringing up my old decisions and try not to see who I am now and I don’t like that.

I hope you all have a ___ day!!

♡ Jes.

During the writing (typing) of this post, I was watching Try Living With Lucie. It is a series of a girl named Lucie who does 5 day challenges and it is so amazing and really inspiring. I will do a post on my favorite podcasts, YouTube series, and more!! I will do this post very soon!
Here is a link of one of my favorite Try Living With Lucie episodes!

Try Living With Lucie S2 Episode 18: 5 days of Only Eating Pizza!

Enjoy this episode and let me know if you guys love her show!!

Truly happy and blessed.

Hi everyone! I am sooo sorry that I am posting this so late! I hope you all are staying happy and healthy as the really bad cold/flu season hits. I have been very unlucky to be hit with a cold that really screwed up my plans to get a few posts done. I am glad though that I am… well I think I am getting over it really quickly.. fingers crossed. I hope everyone also gets over it quickly.

I wanted to finally have a real happy post after my last 2 postings being somewhat sad.

I have spent the last 8 years of my life with depression and it hasn’t been a very good battle until the end of 2018. I finally got a therapist and found my way back to God. I may not have the perfect relationship with God but I feel like it is a work in progress. Anywho…. this is supposed to be a happy post, so no more depression talk!!

I have been having honestly the best year of my life even though it is only February 11th (when I typed this out). haha I am in such a good place in my life that nothing could bug me.. right now. haha

I don’t know how to put in words the feeling my heart gets when I am doing something I love or when I am around the ones I love. All I can say that it is me finally having my true happiness and that I am truly blessed. I prayed so much to God, to get me to a place where I didn’t feel heart ache anymore, and I don’t feel it!

I am now into a phase of my life that I am truly grateful and blessed to be alive and will live my life everyday as gracefully as possible. I may have my days of being a somewhat bitchy person (mostly when Mother Nature is around) but other then that i’ll be nice and live my life happily. haha

When I started this post I was in the process of getting ready to mow my lawn and I wanted to show you the podcast that I listened to. It is by Helen Elizabeth Peters and it is called Your Best New Self podcast. She is my inspiration to start my relationship with God again. To see how strong she was when her first husband Craig Strickland had passed away and to be able to speak about it and grow her ministry from this was so amazing to me and inspired me to reconnect with God.

God has truly blessed me with this life that I have honestly prayed for. I have prayed so many nights to finally be happy and here I finally am. It is honestly thanks to Helen Elizabeth for inspiring me to reconnect with God again.

I honestly love how my life is turning out now. I know it wasn’t all God and I know it was also me helping myself get to this place that I am at now but at the time I needed someone to listen to, that I knew I wouldn’t feel bad for bugging. Having Helen Elizabeth be my inspiration and having the right mindset to get help myself in finding a therapist is what I believe also helped me get to the place I am at today.

I hope everyone has a great Valentine’s Day (if you celebrate today) and if you don’t celebrate it I hope you have a ___ day and enjoy the days you do have that are good.

♡ Jes.

Your Best New Self Podcast!

I won’t let the past hold me back anymore part 2.

Hello everyone, how are you today? I hope you all enjoyed the first blog post of this 2 part post.

I did the first part of an old friend experience that had happened in my past. This post will be about “family” that isn’t around.

So I wasn’t lucky enough to be able to grow up with both parents in my life. Yes, I do have my mom in my life (she is my best friend) but I don’t have a dad. How I found out how he left my life from my mom (when I was old enough to find out) was not the best way but my mom did it to protect me.

When I was growing up I was “lucky” enough to grow up with my “father’s” family in my life I had uncles, aunts, and cousins in my life up until I turned 13. When you think “oh, that is a good thing that have them in your life when your “father” wasn’t”. Let me tell you now, it wasn’t all rainbows and unicorns. I put “lucky” like this because I honestly think now that I could have done without my “father’s” side of the family in my life.

I did have majority of his family in my life for a good 13 years until about a year later when my “grandmother” came by with my grandfather and told my family that they were moving up north, like really far up north and that is the last time I heard from them. Until about the end of 2017 she did message me on Facebook but I deleted it.

I did contact my “father” once when I was 15 years old through me finding him on Myspace (I sound so old.. haha). At that time being 15 and very naive, I thought everything would be different. I thought i’d finally have a dad, be able to go hang out with him, and do all these things that a dad and daughter do together… Well that didn’t happen at all. We planned to meet and I thought it’d be a lot different then how we met. He took me to the mall and really just try to buy my love plain and simple.

Then we had this on going email relationship that went on until I was 18. It was truly not a father daughter relationship that I had dreamt about or even honestly wanted anymore. So one day when I was 18, things had happened to where he tried to start drama with my mom and I cut the whatevership (if you are thinking the last word was a spelling error, it wasn’t) off with him and I haven’t spoken to him since.

So now as of today my “father’s” side haven’t been in my life for the past 13 years except one cousin who kept tabs on my through social media to go back and tell that side how I was doing. I didn’t like it at all so I cut ties with them fully.

I honestly don’t really feel like I am missing out on much with that family not being in my life anymore and I am truly 100% okay with it. I do miss my grandfather a lot but if he is okay and happy, then that is all that matters to me.

Now I bet at the end of this really long post, why did I post a longer & more detailed (had a harder time trying to figure out that word, then i’d like to admit. haha) post then part 1? Well let me tell you! I feel like I am more accepting of this part of my past being fully shut out of my life, then I am of part 1. I don’t feel bad for letting this past go or locking behind the unbreakable concrete door that I am locking it behind. I honestly still have trouble with part 1 and knowing that I hurt someone even if it was unintentional. Also knowing that I can’t really get in contact with that person to say I am sorry. So keeping it as private as I can makes me feel somewhat better, but that is just me.

I hope you all have a ___ day, go enjoy it being you, and being awesome!

♡ Jes.

I chose this song as the song for this post because I am sitting her at work and the weather reminds me of this song. That is how most of my songs for posts will be chosen, unless it has a bigger meaning behind the post.

I won’t let the past hold me back anymore part 1.

Hello everyone! How are you all today? I am doing good, just enjoying some auntie and nephew time with the boys before I go for another long day of work tomorrow (where I will finish this post).

I have realized that some things from my past haven’t really been settled. I haven’t settled them because I didn’t know how to forgive and forget. As of 5:45 am, I decided that I would take the time to forgive, forget, and move on with my life. Not just for my sanity and for me to finally move on in my life and leave the past behind, I did it for my happiness. This past month and into the beginning of this new month, I have honestly been at my best and my happiest. I will not let my past ruin it for me, I will truly let it go and live my life happily.

As the quote from my picture above says “Every moment is a fresh beginning”. I made the sign and it is now hung on my wall. This saying is 100% true to me. At any moment in the day, you can make a change for yourself to have a fresh new beginning in your life and that is what this post is about. It is about how I had my fresh new beginning. It is also about my past decisions, how my decisions have helped me in the long run, and how I am changed because of them.

In my life I have always been safe in the decisions I made. No matter what I didn’t do anything that would get me in trouble or would make me regret my decision in the future. Even now I live a safe decision making life but during the highest point of my depression, I did do something that made me happy (at that moment in time) and made me feel like I was out of my depression. I only started to realize that after awhile, I was still heavily depressed and my choice at the time did emotionally hurt someone a long time after everything had already happened, but at the time I didn’t know that . At the time I didn’t realize that I had hurt the person until it was too late. I don’t really like to go into details and probably won’t because I do try to leave that part of my past behind a very heavy closed door and plus I feel like it is a personal thing to not name the other individuals in this for their privacy.

I can’t be sorry, regret, or not wish that I would take what I did because at that moment in time I was doing something that made me happy in that moment. I just always felt really bad that I did end up hurting someone (not intentionally).

As I type this post out and officially lock the hurt, anger, sadness, tears, and heartache behind a unbreakable concrete door, I will smile and be okay with how my life is turning out now. I am a happy, single, stay at home/working auntie. I love to live my life safely and soundly as possible. I have no hate for anyone in my heart. I just hope that the person that had been affected by my decision in the past is doing well and is living life to the fullest.

I hope everyone has a ____ day.

♡ Jes.  

*I wanted to post this at a later date but my last post (I deleted it) wasn’t what I felt like anymore so it is now bye bye and this one is in it’s place for today’s posting.

*Part 2 will be added on here at it’s normal time of 10 am on Saturday.

*No song was chosen because I didn’t have a song playing or in my head when writing this.

Love you all!!

My goal for the rest of my life.

Have you ever had like one thing in life that you want to change and have tried to change but never can? Well let me tell you about my little problem that I want to change and I would love to hear about yours.

I have a problem which I believe that most people would agree that we may all have, being addicted to our devices (ex: phones, tablets, laptops, computers… etc.). I believe that we all can probably put our phones down more but it is usually easier said then done. I completely understand because I am the same way. I have the problem where I have my phone with me all the time and I feel like I am on it all the time also. I truly honestly don’t like this feeling… so here is my goal!!

Drum roll please!! hahaha I am so dorky.. oh well. Anywho I am going to only be on my phone as need be. I will only be on it when I feel it is necessary to be on it or if I need to do something for my job on it and that is it! It is not necessary for me to be on it at all times, so I will start doing the things that I feel that need my time more than my phone. For example, I will read my big pile of books I have been meaning to read, I will hang out with my nephews, I will do some gardening, and I will do all these things that I have truly been meaning to do but without my phone in my hand.

When my phone isn’t in my hand but I know it is near me, I will automatically check it even though I know in my head that I have no messages or anything on it.

So as I said my goal is to stay off of it more and be more connected with the world outside of my phone.

I hope you all have a ___ day!

♡ Jes.

I chose today this rain video that I listen to when working at Job 1. It calms me down after a long day and I love just the sound of rain. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

Recipe # 2 BBQ Salsa Chicken

Hello eve

This is another old post that I have done and am now reposting it to this blog.

Tonight I have made my very own idea of BBQ salsa chicken.

It is REALLY easy to make!!

First you make can put on the rice, the rice I usually make can serve up to 8 people.

To make the rice you put 2 cups of rice in a pot and add 4 cups of water, you cover the pot of water, and turn on the stove to a low heat. Check on it about every 5-10 mins. When cooking on low heat it’ll take about 35-40 mins or less to cook.

While the rice is cooking you can put frozen vegetables in a steamer (a pot of water underneath another pot with holes in the bottom with the vegetables in it.. . duh!) and have that between medium heat and low heat… I suggest keeping it closer to the low heat so it can cook together with the rice.

Next to start is making the BBQ salsa chicken:

You get Sweet Baby Ray’s BBQ Sauce, A big packet of already cooked Chicken Breast Strips, and any type of fruit salsa you want.

You first turn the heat on and don’t put it too high, keep the head between the medium and low setting but closer to the medium setting. Add the chicken into a wok and add half the container of fruit salsa to the pan. 

You then add the Sweet Baby Ray’s BBQ Sauce to the pan and mix it all together. You can mix all the ingredients together and let it simmer on medium/low heat for about 15+ mins depending on how hot you want the food. Just make sure you stir it every few minutes. 

It is pretty easy and simple to make, the time to make the food maybe depend on how fast you make the food because I know I got the chicken done in 15-20 mins because I put the heat up and mixed everything right away. But the rice and vegetables do take awhile to cook. 

Finished product.

I hope whoever tries this likes this recipe!

I make this for my family and everyone including the picky eaters like it. 

Please let me know in the comments or message me if you tried it and liked it! 

♡ Jes.